A few days ago, my cage was rattled.\u00a0 I was attempting to stop a naive and innocent event from causing my youngest to cry. My attempt was met with my classification as “shameful” and “pitiful.” Followed by this classification, I was given a dissertation from another member of this grouping. The subject of this dissertation was how evil I was. I would say that I have since severed all ties with these people, but my situation is more than that. I had put up my defenses years ago and started lowering them about 8 months ago, thinking a potential reconciliation was possible.<\/p>\n
I no longer think that is possible.\u00a0 For some reason, unbeknownst to me, I have completely angered this faction.\u00a0 What ever I did, dates prior to my date of confinement. Consequently, I see the last few days as a return to the status quo.<\/p>\n
I am no angel. That is a fact. However, am I not the only one to share blame. Frankly, I don’t know what blame there needs to be shared. They may know what started their hatred of me.\u00a0 The signatory event is lost to me. I want to reiterate, that I am no angel. But, I’m lost at what actions I could have committed that would have remanded me as ostracized. There I am, and will remain. I won’t let my guard down again.<\/p>\n
Three years into this disorder being critical and we have limited answers.\u00a0 My daily routine includes about 2 hours during which time my pain level is below 7\/10. I don’t have time to play. I have come to accept and understand continued intense and extensive pain. It milks your mind and your soul. If I seem that I regard myself “Godly” it is because I have surrendered myself to my Savior. There can be no other way. It definitely doesn’t mean I am sinless. It means I am sinful and looking for forgiveness from the only One that can grant it. I seek solace in His cloak.<\/p>\n
I don’t know what I am doing, nor do I know where I am going.\u00a0 But He walks with me when it is dark, and light. For me, it is easier to see Him when it is dark. When it is light, I try to recognize His gifts in the birds, insects and flora He has granted me access to. He gives me peace.<\/p>\n
No, I am a sinner, and I need His light in my life, always.<\/p>\n
In His Name,<\/p>\n
Jay C. Theriot<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
A few days ago, my cage was rattled.\u00a0 I was attempting to stop a naive and innocent event from causing my youngest to cry. My attempt was met with my classification as “shameful” and “pitiful.” Followed by this classification, I was given a dissertation from another member of this grouping. The subject of this dissertation […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[5],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-1347","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-acceptance"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/jayscafe.net\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1347","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/jayscafe.net\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/jayscafe.net\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/jayscafe.net\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/jayscafe.net\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=1347"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/jayscafe.net\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1347\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/jayscafe.net\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=1347"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/jayscafe.net\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=1347"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/jayscafe.net\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=1347"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}